Total Discomfort Uplifted by Love & Support. 

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The only thing I have ever done at a craft fair is go with my wife and shop. 

This time, it is different. 

I bring camping chairs for patrons to relax in, to stop long enough to swap stories.  Six chairs to be exact.  Millie didn’t understand my approach because it was so different, but she’s use to that.  I’m great at reaching out to people.  I LOOOOVE talking with people!  But that was not our purpose being there....or was it?  A friend of mine, Pastor Jed, stopped by with his family and I shared with him one of my big struggles today and therefore in life was allowing people to get close to my heart.  I believe it is because the first 8 years of my life I watched my mom battle cancer and die.  Being close in a relationship opens room for loss.  Most of my relationships are superficial.  Maybe MY purpose in being out of my comfort zone today was an exercise in opening my heart.  

But there’s an even bigger challenge of discomfort for me today.

This time, I am in TOTAL discomfort as we seek out the goodwill of others in behalf of our mission to bring our three Haiti children home.  

I attribute this discomfort of mine to a lack of wealth as a child and a stern determination to be a hot headed independent provider for any material desire my family and community want.  The idea that my all is not enough to make the impossible happen simply terrifies me because it means I must ask for help.  While I rarely turn down help, seeking it out with no expectation of equal compensation is not my forte!  

Some people are showing their love with financial support, which is the reason we are here. That is the only reason I am uncomfortable. Some people are showing their love with stories. I am amazed at how many total strangers have been involved with adoption in one form or another; everyone of them saying how difficult the process was, and everyone of them saying it is a magical and wonderful blessing in their lives.   Each person who stopped to talk wanted to follow our story and always left with encouraging words to stay strong in our effort.

I don’t like feeling vulnerable and I’ve mistakenly viewed someone asking for help as weak when what I learned today is that it’s a godlike attribute and a gift of strength in a way I never would have understood otherwise.  

Opening up my heart and allowing others to get close also opens an opportunity for pain and loss but it brings an even greater opportunity for love, support, and connection that will last through life and eternity.  

Perhaps today was just “going to a craft fair”, but I think it ended up being soooo much more.  Perhaps it’s the beginning of my loving God bringing great challenges to my life so my heart can open and allow loving people to get close and to teach me that asking for help is a strength all in itself.  Perhaps this process of adoption is not about me saving a child from a life without family.  Perhaps it’s about a loving God saving my family and I from our weaknesses as we reach out to love His children as best we know how.  

Post-blog request: 

Please follow our page ("bookmark" it on your browser or subscribe via blogger to get email updates).  When you feel inclined to bless us with your story, your words of encouragement, or anything else good, please comment.  If our adventures may help you or someone you know, please share our blog with them.  We are also happily accepting donations.  To help us financially, we have the following options:
A. Venmo "Millie-Hoggan" or 
B. Mailed Check made out to "Hoggan Handfuls Adoption Benefit Account" and mailed to Alpine Bank (Mail to 82 Sipprelle Dr, Battlement Mesa, CO 81636) 
C. Walk-in cash donations at Alpine Banks in Colorado to the "Hoggan Handfuls Adoption Benefit Account".  
We understand you can only give so much financially each month to causes you support.  If you can’t help us now, but want to, we ask that you think of us and our mission the next time you can give financial support to someone.  
Regardless of how you participate in our efforts to raise our little tribe, we appreciate the prayers, the kind words, and uplifting stories shared by so many!  May your loving kindness come full circle in your life.  

With much love, 

The Hoggan's